As I sat on the floor of my bathroom, my sweat soaked back pressed into the wall furthest from the toilet, my rear scrunching old magazines and my diaper cream streaked hands tenuously holding the sliding door shut, I decided it was time to re-evaluate the American Dream. A loving husband: check. A beautiful, sun-soaked home, five minutes from the beach: check. Children…double check. There they were, pounding on the door, moaning and rubbing their faces up against the fogged